This week we were asked by Show Hope to write some words of advice to other adoptive families who are in process. Last fall we received a grant from Show Hope and feel honored to be part of their network of families. Since we feel like "professional waiting adoptive parents," we had a few thoughts to share...
Our family has been on an incredible adoption journey for almost five years. It has been a painful, but extremely rewarding journey. We believed that God had called our family to open our hearts and home to one child. Instead, He has opened our lives to impacting thousands of orphans as we have become deeply involved in orphan care. Through a series of "God ordained events," I have been privileged to lead six orphan outreach trips overseas and our family has become passionate about the international orphan crisis. The waiting for our daughter has been confusing at times. We suffered from a failed adoption in El Salvador and lost all of the funds invested in that adoption ($15,000). However, we still felt led to adopt and after much prayer and counsel, enrolled in Korea. At that time, we had no funds available for a Korean adoption. But we had faith in a big God who was not overwhelmed by the costs or challenges of updating home studies, immigration paperwork and all that was required.
Since that time, we have raised over $11,000, including a $2,000 grant from Show Hope. We organized an iPod raffle on our adoption website (www.ramseyfam.com) and raised close to $3,000 in two months. Our church hosted a blood drive to help raise funds for adopting families and supported our family. An adoptive family that we have never met heard about our need and contributed $3,000 though our Lifesong for Orphans online Paypal account. Needless to say, our journey has been nothing short of miraculous. God has provided funds through neighbors, co-workers, and people that we have never even met. And He has opened our eyes to "the least of these" and allowed us to serve His orphans. It has truly been a privilege.
The waiting can be painful and can even feel cruel and senseless at times. We have watched other friends complete numerous adoptions while we've waited just for one. But we're learning not to compare or judge other situations. The last page of my adoption journal is now completed and we have not yet received a referral. However, the journal is filled with miraculous stories of God's provision and comfort. It is filled with stories of our family serving in third world orphanages. While it is not filled with our completed adoption yet, it is filled with testimonies of a powerful God who knows every hair on our heads. The verse that we continue to hold onto is this:
"But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, be patient! For it will surely take place. It will not be late by a single day." - Habakkuk 2:3
Monday, March 19, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
SHOCKING: Orangutan Care vs. Orphan Care
Our son Aidan recently brought home a Scholastic News magazine with an adorable cover photo of an orphaned baby orangutan. As Aidan and I read the article on the orangutans together, I was amazed by the level of care that these orphaned orangutans receive at The Nyaru Menteng Center in Indonesia (home to more than 600 orangutans). The little cuties receive "life and survival skills," including how to swing from trees and how to flee poisonous snakes. The babies live in a nursery with "human baby-sitters" who provide 24 hour care. The following is a quote from the magazine:
"At night, the babies are tucked into laundry baskets filled with blankets and pillows. The baby-sitters sleep nearby or snuggle up next to them, just like the babies' orangutan moms used to do. When the apes get older, they go to Forest School. They are taught how to climb trees, build nests, and find food. Orangutans usually learn these things from their moms. But these orangutans have lost their mothers. Most of the orangutans graduate when they turn 6. Then they're released into a protected part of the jungle. They have a right to live in the wild and to live healthy and free, says orangutan expert Michelle Desilets."
Wow! I was shocked to discover that these orangutans have humans caregivers who actually cuddle and sleep next to them. Incredible. Upon further investigation (through the website), I discovered that the orangutans have been gifted with iPads to help increase their knowledge and creativity. Now don't get me wrong. I think these little guys are adorable. However, after serving in six orphanages in Guatemala and El Salvador, I must question why baby orangutans are receiving greater care than baby humans. I applaud The Nyaru Menteng Center for their stunning level of care and commitment to these creatures. But this article left me baffled. There are an estimated 147 million orphans in the world. To my knowledge, there are very few orphanages which provide this level of care for their children. And that should disturb each of us deeply.
Is it possible that we can learn some lessons from The Nyaru Menteng Center in Indonesia? There are many complicated issues which must be accounted for in this discussion. Most orphans around the world are orphaned due to poverty, abuse or AIDS/HIV. Most orphanages simply lack the financial resources to provide the level of care given to these outrageously lucky baby orangutans. But this simply should not be. The orphan crisis is an international crisis. Orphaned children demand our love, compassion and sense of urgency. They deserve a GREATER level of care than these animals. And we can do something about it. Some of us can adopt or foster children. Some can not. But we can each do something.
How can you change the orphan crisis? You can give financially. You can support an orphanage. You can sponsor a child or visit orphans on an orphan outreach trip. You can use your educational or business skills to train foster children or prepare children in orphanages with life and job skills. You can contact your government leaders to express your concerns about the international orphan crisis and how UNICEF is causing many international adoption programs to close. Get involved. Do something. What would you do if your child was stuck in foster care or in an impoverished orphanage? Millions of children are stuck today and they need your help.
“You may choose to look the other way but you can never say again that you did not know.” ― William Wilberforce (British politician, philanthropist and leader of the movement to abolish the slave trade)
"At night, the babies are tucked into laundry baskets filled with blankets and pillows. The baby-sitters sleep nearby or snuggle up next to them, just like the babies' orangutan moms used to do. When the apes get older, they go to Forest School. They are taught how to climb trees, build nests, and find food. Orangutans usually learn these things from their moms. But these orangutans have lost their mothers. Most of the orangutans graduate when they turn 6. Then they're released into a protected part of the jungle. They have a right to live in the wild and to live healthy and free, says orangutan expert Michelle Desilets."
Wow! I was shocked to discover that these orangutans have humans caregivers who actually cuddle and sleep next to them. Incredible. Upon further investigation (through the website), I discovered that the orangutans have been gifted with iPads to help increase their knowledge and creativity. Now don't get me wrong. I think these little guys are adorable. However, after serving in six orphanages in Guatemala and El Salvador, I must question why baby orangutans are receiving greater care than baby humans. I applaud The Nyaru Menteng Center for their stunning level of care and commitment to these creatures. But this article left me baffled. There are an estimated 147 million orphans in the world. To my knowledge, there are very few orphanages which provide this level of care for their children. And that should disturb each of us deeply.
Is it possible that we can learn some lessons from The Nyaru Menteng Center in Indonesia? There are many complicated issues which must be accounted for in this discussion. Most orphans around the world are orphaned due to poverty, abuse or AIDS/HIV. Most orphanages simply lack the financial resources to provide the level of care given to these outrageously lucky baby orangutans. But this simply should not be. The orphan crisis is an international crisis. Orphaned children demand our love, compassion and sense of urgency. They deserve a GREATER level of care than these animals. And we can do something about it. Some of us can adopt or foster children. Some can not. But we can each do something.
How can you change the orphan crisis? You can give financially. You can support an orphanage. You can sponsor a child or visit orphans on an orphan outreach trip. You can use your educational or business skills to train foster children or prepare children in orphanages with life and job skills. You can contact your government leaders to express your concerns about the international orphan crisis and how UNICEF is causing many international adoption programs to close. Get involved. Do something. What would you do if your child was stuck in foster care or in an impoverished orphanage? Millions of children are stuck today and they need your help.
“You may choose to look the other way but you can never say again that you did not know.” ― William Wilberforce (British politician, philanthropist and leader of the movement to abolish the slave trade)
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Leaving the Pity Party....
The past few weeks have been filled with many emotions. As seen in the adoption timeline at the top of our blog, it has been nearly five years since we started our adoption journey. Five years!!! That's a long time to be expecting and waiting. Talk about "What to expect when you're expecting!" We have recently begun to question our adoption path, especially in light of some recent heart breaks as well as changes in our adoption program. Needless to say, we have become extremely frustrated with ongoing challenges and delays. That's why I decided to plan my own party. My pity party.
However, after weeks of prayer, journalling and intense conversations with close friends, family and colleagues, we have decided to leave the pity party and march forward. We have become willing to increase the age of a child at the time of referral (the paperwork which matches a child with their forever family) and have made the required changes in our home study. Our Korea adoption program director believes that our family could receive a referral soon and does not feel that Mike's age is an issue. One of the Korean adoption policies is that neither parent can be older than 45, and Mike is nearing his 44th birthday. Once again, we have no other choice than to release our worries and fears and fully trust God's perfect timing. And that's a great place to be. I prefer to party at God's throne... a much better place than my own pity party!
So, what does this mean for our family? It is very possible that we could be matched with a little girl some time in the next few months. In the meantime, we continue to apply for grants and trust God with the financial requirements needed for a Korean adoption. We still need close to $15,000 in order to accept a referral from Korea. The required fees are $18,040 to Korea and $3,700 for adoption agency costs. We are extremely grateful for the $2,000 grant that we received from Show Hope last fall. We also received some significant donations from friends over the holidays, which deeply encouraged our hearts.
If you feel led to partner with our family in helping to meet these financial needs, contributions can be made through Lifesong for Orphans. We are beginning to feel more and more excitement building in our hearts as we consider the fact that our family may actually be adopting in the near future. We trust God's perfect timing and are amazed at all that He has done in our lives in the last five years. We recognize that His plan for us goes way beyond one adoption. It involves advocating for adoption, foster care and orphan care, supporting adopting families and leading teams to serve orphans overseas. It has been an unbelievable journey. Thank you for standing with us in our amazing adoption adventures! And thank you to those of you who briefly attended the pity party and encouraged our hearts!
However, after weeks of prayer, journalling and intense conversations with close friends, family and colleagues, we have decided to leave the pity party and march forward. We have become willing to increase the age of a child at the time of referral (the paperwork which matches a child with their forever family) and have made the required changes in our home study. Our Korea adoption program director believes that our family could receive a referral soon and does not feel that Mike's age is an issue. One of the Korean adoption policies is that neither parent can be older than 45, and Mike is nearing his 44th birthday. Once again, we have no other choice than to release our worries and fears and fully trust God's perfect timing. And that's a great place to be. I prefer to party at God's throne... a much better place than my own pity party!
So, what does this mean for our family? It is very possible that we could be matched with a little girl some time in the next few months. In the meantime, we continue to apply for grants and trust God with the financial requirements needed for a Korean adoption. We still need close to $15,000 in order to accept a referral from Korea. The required fees are $18,040 to Korea and $3,700 for adoption agency costs. We are extremely grateful for the $2,000 grant that we received from Show Hope last fall. We also received some significant donations from friends over the holidays, which deeply encouraged our hearts.
If you feel led to partner with our family in helping to meet these financial needs, contributions can be made through Lifesong for Orphans. We are beginning to feel more and more excitement building in our hearts as we consider the fact that our family may actually be adopting in the near future. We trust God's perfect timing and are amazed at all that He has done in our lives in the last five years. We recognize that His plan for us goes way beyond one adoption. It involves advocating for adoption, foster care and orphan care, supporting adopting families and leading teams to serve orphans overseas. It has been an unbelievable journey. Thank you for standing with us in our amazing adoption adventures! And thank you to those of you who briefly attended the pity party and encouraged our hearts!
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