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"God sets the lonely in families" - Psalm 68:6



Monday, August 27, 2012

Attachment and Bonding

Over the past few years as we have prepared to bring home an internationally adopted child, we have been blessed to attend seminars, read books and hear personal stories about attachment.  Parenting an internationally adopted child is a journey filled with joys, surprises and unique challenges.  As we have prepared to attach and bond with Hailey, we have eliminated many of our commitments and emptied our schedules for the next few months.

What will this look like for our family?  I will not be leading any overseas teams in the near future.  The next All Blessings trip is scheduled to El Salvador in July, 2013, and Mike will most likely lead the team.  We will not be hosting our weekly community group or any other events in our home for a while.  And we plan to limit visitors and even outings to large places (church, big events) for the first few weeks and possibly months.  We will be following Hailey's cues to see how she reacts around strangers and how comfortable she feels in new settings.   Our family will basically be "hunkering down" as much as possible, spending time in the safety of our home as Hailey begins to familiarize herself with the sights, smells, sounds, emotions and daily routines of the Ramsey household.  Our primary goal is to build trust with Hailey as quickly as possible.

We deeply appreciate your prayers as all five of us adjust to the new normal.  There will be tremendous adjustments for all of us, and especially for the boys.  Please pray for patience as we enter into this exciting, new season.  Over the past month we have memorized Bible verses to help prepare our hearts for Korea and for life with Hailey.

"Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud." - I Corinthians 13:4 (Jordan's verse)

"Be joyful always, pray continually.  Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." - I Thessalonians 5:16-18 (Aidan's verse)

"Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God, but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.  We know that we live in him and he in us, because he has given us his Spirit."  - I John 4:12  (Mike and Jenni's verse)

2 comments:

  1. I will put you guys in my daily prayer journal, anxious to see how God answers your very specific prayers for bonding with Hailey. We'll be in Calif. for a wee bit in late October, maybe we can chat on the phone? Blessings and prayers and have a wonderful birthing experience in Korea!
    Love,
    Nancy Prokop

    ReplyDelete
  2. Aidan's verse is one of Leslie Parkes' favorites, as well as mine. She shared it with me years ago. We are all blessed by your journey and we love you.

    ReplyDelete

The Vision

God spoke this vision regarding our adoption journey to Barbara Lange on March 26, 2010...

"Jenni,


I have made the decision to speak our boldly when God speaks to me. Last night as I was washing the dishes I received this "vision" of you. I hesitate to use the word "vision," but what I saw was a slide of your life. As I watched the show in my mind I began to cry because I was so touched by what I saw. You and I have shared many tears these last couple of years, both sorrow and joy. The attachment is what I saw.

FRAME 1

Jenni sitting at the South Coast Community Church reception desk with the photo album of her courtship and engagement to Mike.

FRAME 2

Jenni performing the gospel message in mime at New Harvest Community Church, showing her heart for the lost and oppressed. Jenni performing the gospel in mime on missions trips everywhere she is able to go. Her Father rejoicing at her obedience and passion.

FRAME 3

The anguished look of a woman desperately wanting to have children. Unsuccessful fertility treatements.

FRAME 4

God watching over His daughter, His heart breaking as tears flow down her cheeks. He whispers in her ear, "My child, I know how broken you feel, but I have a great plan and purpose for your life. This anguish, this heartbreak, this pain will subside. Joy is on its' way. I needed you to suffer in this way because of My plan is for you. You are going to be an advocate for international adoptions. You are going to spread my gospel this way.

FRAME 5

The births of Jordan and Aidan! At last a MOM!

FRAME 6

Having experienced the heartbreak of infertility, Jenni's passion for adoption grows.


FRAME 7

Jenni's passion for missions and adoption begin to fuse.


FRAME 8

The Ramseys start the adoption process for a daughter.

FRAME 9

Jenni goes to Washington DC and connects with adoption leaders. Relationships follow, teamwork begins. Jenni begins a new chapter in her life in the intl. adoption network.

FRAME 10

The slow adoption process is agonizing to the Ramseys.

FRAME 11

Jenni leads a missions team to El Salvador and learns sad news about El Salvador adoptions and specifically their own plans. Heartbroken again, but resolved to press on.

FRAME 12

More networking with intl. adoptions, hope for their daughter and another trip to El Salvador. Jordan goes to El Salvador. The orphans are overwhelmed and ecstatic that Jenni returns. Jenni and Jordan build "forever friendships and family" in El Salvador. Jenni's passion increases.

FRAME 13

Jenni prepares for third trip to El Salvador in one year. Amazing things happen.

FRAME 14 - THE FINAL FRAME...

Mike and Jenni, standing now, older, graying hair, surrounded by their sons and their wives, their daughters and their husbands and their grandchildren. Below them are thousands of children joyously celebrating Jenni's life. Her passion to follow her Father's call and purpose on her life is fulfilled. These thousands of children represent all of the orphans, adoptions and ripple affect of her life's work.

A work that could not be accomplished without the pain, suffering and brokeness she endured trying to become a mom.


Well done, my good and faithful servant."

A Heartwarming Adoption Story.... the Howerton's Miraculous Haitian Adoption Journey

God's Heart for Orphans...

An Incredible Video...

"Cry of The Orphan" - Thoughts on orphan care from some of my greatest heroes!